"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us." -Marianne Williamson

I've become interested in the Olympics recently. Actually, a specific sport has brought the olympics closer to the forefront of my thoughts. The road to the Olympics, as well as the immense power that comes with being an elite gymnast fascinates me. I've spent most of my free time here watching gymnastics (which coincidentally happens very late into the night).

However, today I was watching an introduction to the Olympic contenders video and this quote at the top of this post was spoken. It spoke to me. All of these gymnasts feel their power every time they go out on the mat, the bars, the beam, or any of the other apparati. The sport breeds strength of will and determination, passion and skill. It ingrains a person with such dedication and motivation, which inspires me every time I see it.

The quote gave me pause. I considered that we worry so much about how we present ourselves and what others think of us. We are constantly trying to measure up to others and be the best self we can. If we spent half as much time thinking about how great we actually are and how much we are truly capable of, instead of worrying about other people, we might actually be better off! Indeed, we may be happier, stronger, more secure people. And the more we can feel that power, beauty and strength, the more we are capable of and the more we will believe in our abilities.

As I am not solidified in my opinions and ideas, I relish feedback and opinions. Do other people have thoughts on this idea?

Rabbinic Lessons: 3 vs. 22

 

Perfection. That is what I usually require in most aspects of my life. Of course, I have never been, and will continue to not be perfect. However, I have not yet figured out how to do that. This is not about that, but rather my adventures with the Hebrew language.

            Hebrew is a language that I have engaged and struggled with for many years. Time after time I have tested into the lowest level Hebrew class, not even getting past the past tense. Each class gets me to an incredible point where I feel more comfortable with the language, like I can actually participate in the culture and be a part of the society. However, I have never felt capable of actually interacting fully and immersing myself in only Hebrew.

            At this point, all I want is to be fluent. I want to dream in Hebrew, be able to understand the conversations I hear on the street and know what the man is telling me at the shuk! I want to be immersed. Although a worthwhile goal for some point down the road, I don’t believe it is reasonable for the moment. HOWEVER, the expectation I have teaches me a very important lesson:

            As a three year old child, playing with, adapting, and engaging in language is a fun activity. It is inspiring and kids learn so much from their mistakes (that is something I have definitely started to do!). Even more than that, 3 year olds are not embarrassed in the least by whatever mistakes they make. They just move on and eventually learn to correct them. Twenty-two-year-old young women are not quiet as good. They also adapt, adopt and engage the language. They also make mistakes and can be inspired/inspiring for others. But those twenty-two year old young women also chastise themselves when a mistake occurs and often find it frustrating or even infuriating when they cannot think of a word or do not know how to say what is on their mind.

            This evening, I went to a session at one of the three reform congregations in Jerusalem, Kehilat Har El, to study Pirkei Avot. I was excited for the experience of only speaking Hebrew and sat down eager to engage. Quickly, I realized how far under I was, that I barely understood anything. I understood a few things here or there, and definitely knew some of the stories the Rabbi was referring to, but after a while I just zoned out. Attempting to listen constantly became overwhelming. Oddly enough, the entire time, my thoughts were mostly in Hebrew. Although I couldn’t understand the flow of the conversation, I was thinking about my own relations with the language, and my relations with other people.

Afterwards, talking with Lori about the experience, I realized I understood more than I thought, but it was more big picture stuff so I had a much more difficult time putting it all together. Learning Torah or commentary or Mishna or anything of the sort is not an easy task, made infinitely more difficult by the added handicap of a new language. If I am truly going to capture this language, I need to give myself a break, and not expect so much from each day, but also continue to push myself to explore new avenues of learning and listening.

            This language is wonderful. Not perfect, just wonderful. I love it, no matter how difficult it gets and I cannot wait to continue this amazing journey of self-discovery and passion!

words, WoRdS, WORDS!! ALL OF THEM WORDS

Yesterday was wonderful. Rachel and I stayed in the library to do homework, and when we were done, we were both headed towards her apartment, so we went together. In her apartment, I ended up spending 15 minutes or so exclaiming over a guidebook (to which she asked if I often exclaimed aloud, even when alone (the answer of course being yes)). Finally we left for what turned out to be our collective errands.

            The first stop was the used and rare book store right up the street from her house. I had been in it once before, so this time knew exactly what I was looking for. We thoroughly enjoyed looking through the children’s books but couldn’t find anything worthwhile or that looked like it had good enough pictures. However, I did find Harry Potter in Hebrew. I know I’ve read all the books a bunch, but hopefully that will help make the Hebrew easier, because I already kind of know what it is saying/context. For example, I figured out stuff relating to divination, because Trelawny started talking about seeing the students in the corporeal world! So cool!! Plus, its higher language, so it of course challenges me. But at least I get to be a little kid again in how excited I get (I tend to act like a little kid when I am reading and come across a word I know, especially in the newspaper or something, because it’s rare enough to still BE exciting!

            Anyway, we left there and went to what was Tesco in Prague and equivocal to super Target in the states. On the bottom floor is a grocery, the entry floor (קרקר) has a pharmacy, and the next two levels home stuff and clothing. Right in the entrance were two tables with items on sale. As most of the things there were books, I gravitated to them! A woman helped us find a good book (it rhymed!!) and then I picked out two I had read as a child: Cordoroy and something about a potty or pooping. Then to the grocery, where we decided we would make Shakshuka for dinner, and home.

            Back at Rachel’s, we sat on the couch and played Words with friends. However, we didn’t really interact, we just sat there playing our own games independently. Unfortunately, something tells me this will become more and more common in the coming generations, as they forget how to actually be with people and interact with them. We did figure it out, eventually coming together to cook dinner and eat and talk. And talk we did. We talked about working in a synagogue and having real life experience, about what that looked like and how it has shaped the place we are today. It’s fascinating to hear different people’s life experiences and learn from them, realizing that some we share and some we don’t.

            After dinner, I skyped with my parents (Rachel’s conversation with her mom earlier highly resembled mine with my parents). Then we decided to try out one of my new books, so took turns reading the little stories on each page! When we didn’t know a word, we looked it up. Oh my, was it incredible! We were both so happy and enjoyed it so much. Then, we looked up Lion King in Hebrew and watched a compilation of Lion King songs from the Hebrew movie! So awesome. Next I introduced Rachel to מץ פטל, so we spent another 11 minutes watching that. Then it was time for home.

            Yesterday was so wonderful! That is the kind of immersion and interaction I want out of my time here in Israel. I want to pick up as much Hebrew as possible and get as strong a grasp on the language as possible. That means soap operas, butchering words often, just trying to push them out, talking with Israelis all the time, reading the newspaper and listening to Israeli/Hebrew music. It will be hard and take time, but I want to do that. I just need to make sure it doesn’t get in the way of the relationships I have begun and will continue to make!

Tactility, taste, talking and trading (money, that is): The Shuk!

Of course you wanted to hear about the cuisine! Israelis have a much better healthy tendency than Americans, due to the fact that the food here is so fresh. I go to the shuk (open market) at least 2 times a week to get the freshest fruits, vegetables, spices and more. Honestly, whatever I can think of that I need in my apartment, whether to clean the floor or cook dinner in, I can find it there. Most of the shopping there is reserved for food, though. I love the fact that the fruits and vegetables are so cheap!

            One of my friends loves to experiment with his cooking and out of some mutually formed respect, we venture the shuk together. He has taught me to smell the peppers to see which are the most fresh, while I in turn am the one to spot the best deals on cucumbers (they are pretty cheap, but often come rather flacid, so we have to be careful who we buy them from). But hey, 4 NIS for 6 cucumbers is a wonderful price, and keeps both our apartments very happy! Also, we can try the cherries and other smaller food as we walk through, in order to make sure we are buying food that is both fresh and tasty. That makes the entire experience all the more pleasant! I love the freshest cherries and picking up a piece of dried pineapple! I get to experience foods here that I have never had, or always been too scared to buy in case I didn't like them. I now know I like dried strawberries and mango, but not ginger as much.

            Another wonderful thing about the shuk is that the same people are in the same places everyday. Jeff and I have found the person we consider "our" spice guy and "our" hummus guy. Amos, the hummus guy is absolutely fantastic, although tends to make fun of my desire to speak Hebrew all the time with his just as strong desire to break out his English! However, he knows us now, jokes with us, and gives us advice, free samples, and the freshest food! He also helps correct my Hebrew. The spreads we get there could be meals in and of themselves! I always pick up a thing of מתבוחה (tomato-y, spicy vegetable dip), hummus, hummus (chick peas are also called hummus in this country), and this week I tried baba ghanoush. All of it is spectacular! Plus I always have to get some mozzarella cheese (there is nothing like knowing you are getting the freshest cheese!

            The spice guy is not specifically as friendly, but we love his shop and always go there for the spices. It may not be the best place, but it is cheap and we know we will get quality. As Jeff is much more adventurous than I, he will pick out random spices with which to experiment, while I try to stick to the more known ones. Something tells me that as I get more comfortable, I will venture further into the world of cooking. It also helps that I don't always know what I am getting! For instance, the other day I was trying to make fajita chicken, and successfully bought coriander or oregano, or something (whatever spice looks like parsley when not chopped-oh, cilantro!). However, when we got home, Ted tried all of the spices and tried a different one that was fiery hot! It turns out he tried the one that wasn't the cilantro, but thought it was. Basically, all of our spices can become something very different, very quickly. No matter, each meal and trip to the shuk is an adventure.

            The fact that you don't even have to barter in the shuk because things are so cheap is another advantage! But I still barter sometimes anyway, for the bigger stuff, because it is fun. For example, I tried to bring the pita guy down from 5 shekels for 10 to four shekels for 10, but he wasn't having it. Eventually, I just gave up. The next time, I sent Jeff because the guy got so mad at me! Hopefully we'll get them back to 5 shekels for 10 and I can get back on their good side!

            No matter, I will keep venturing into the shuk and trying new things!

            Israelis do eat fried foods, which has been a problem for me. The biggest problem is in restaurants, where even when something is grilled it is often layered in so much oil that I have to blot it off. I know it looks weird and don't want to do it, but it isn't about fear. Its honestly about having gotten one too many stomach aches that I am not willing to do that to myself again. I am working on ordering ungreasy things, and will hopefully learn how to say that in Hebrew, to make the whole thing easier. Basically, I just have to be careful what I order. And can't eat out too much too close together. The falafel and schwarma (yes, I have eaten lamb and enjoyed it, as long as I don't think about it too much) are both WAY too greasy for me, but I love both treats, so am willing to indulge every once in a while. My biggest weakness is when it comes to fries, which I will eat like nobody's business. Unfortunately, those are things that tend to make me the most sick! It means I have to stop myself, which is sometimes hard, but I am learning, and figuring out and yes, still making mistakes.

            Another great adventure I went on, which surprised even me, was going into a cafe. These places have some of the most delectable sweets, which I have always been afraid of and therefore avoided the complete place like the plague. However, I was with a friend who wanted something, so we went in. I didn't get anything at first, but felt like I was chickening out, so we went back. I wanted ice cream, nothing else, but ended up buying ice cream AND a sweet treat for later. That cake thing, reminiscent of tiramisu was one of the most decadent sweets I have had in a very long time. So long, fear of cafes! I need to learn to appreciate you and will soon be a frequent customer in you! Soon I will venture into the world of frozen drinks, but not yet!

Protect the President

Walking home from the other apartment this morning, I had to walk down Balfour and saw very interesting things happening. Now, half of Balfour is like a normal street, but half of it is where the Prime Minister lives. Therefore they have to make sure the street is safe and all that jazz (although they seem to be attempting to build half the street for more people in the government, so very few people actually live there).

Anyway, this morning I was walking home and they were checking the street. There was a guy checking under a covered car, who seemed to be looking for a bomb or something. Another guy was walking in with what looked like a black lab, presumably to check the street for bombs. Although I've seen a lot of people there early in the morning, this was even more than normal. Ahh, a day in the life of the prime minister!

The best was as I was walking down I saw a monk walking toward the exit to his monastery to the street. I love that the monastery is right next to the prime ministers house! The whole situation is made better by it!

A few days ago I also saw a great thing! Two limos were following a regular police car, followed by a giant SUV. The SUV and limos surprised me, because cars in this country are generally smaller and shorter than American cars. Anyway, it was just surprising to me! Plus the limos had police lights on top! It was likely headed to the prime ministers house, but who knows. I felt special to see it (although I know it was just my timing...)

Presentation Matters

We went to the Israeli Presidential Conference today, which was incredible. What struk me the most about the whole experience was that the panels were all set up in very different ways. The first session we went to (the reason we were all invited to attend in the first place) was about religious expression in the future, and how different religions will get along. Interestingly, each of the panelists spent more time talking about the current state of affairs of religion, in whatever their area of expertise was (Israel, the middle east, Europe, or the United States) and so didn’t really touch on the future. Not until the end, where someone actually asked a question about peace in Israel, did the subject begin to be broached. And even then, only Rabbi Melchior was speaking.

            In that vain, Rabbi Melchior was the only one of four, five if you include the narrator, who did not have a pre-written speeh. Due to that, the panel was less of a discussion and more of an expose of the work these people have done in their specific areas of interest. Only during Rabbi Melchior’s turn to speak did I truly feel engaged, like he was ready to have a discussion. However, like much of the Orthodox world, he is truly one who likes to fight, be loud and passionate, and get his opinions heard. He had an agenda, he had things to say, but he still did not fit in with the other three academians.

            If nothing else, this experience taught me that when choosing a panel of people to represent the issue, I first need to make sure I put together a group of people who have a good working dynamic together, and who are able to engage each other in a dialogue. Next, I need to ensure that the moderator is vivacious enough to keep the attention of the audience and to keep the panelists on track. Neither of those two things really happened here and therefore derailed the whole experience for me.

Highlights from the first panel:

·    "Religious freedom is an expression of gods will or the carrying out of gods will". Whichever you believe can be part of the solution or the problem.

·    The less religious a person is, the more likely they are to vote democratically. 15% of US population said to not believe in God. They, plus the black population makes up the base of the democratic movement.

·    Americans tend to view religion as chosen, rather than something that is ascribed. It's brought about polarization, where the people who are in the middle, without truly strong adherence, dropping out of the dynamic. Can be seen as a worldwide phenomenon (likely why so many people are afraid of it). His Conclusion: of religion is not part of the solution; it will be part of the problem.

·    They didn't believe in God but believed that God had promised them the land.

·    More than 50% going to religious schools (Jews in Israel).

·    Religion is the biggest NGO in the world.

·    Religion can be a drug for death (Talmud).

·    Secularizing the peace process may not solve problems because part of the problem stems from the extremist religious entities believing they are better than others. (everyone wants to bring about peace, but no one seems willing to work together, to talk quietly. Of course that is a desire for something that we don't know is possible. HOWEVER, after hearing that the control over the Church of the Holy Sepulcher was given to Muslims because the Christians couldn't all get along in trying to own it, I wonder why something similar might not be done for other places in Jerusalem. Why cannot something similar to that be done with regard to the Kotel and other sacred places, giving control to actually impartial parties (if that even exists), allowing all people who want to visit to come in but not keep fighting against each other, for the same thing? Is that even possible?). (I’m still trying to make a solution out of something that doesn’t get at the base of the issue, which is people’s prejudices. People need to understand that everyone is a person, no matter their religion, sexual identity or anything else and deserves the right to live freely.

·    "We're all temporary residents here. Let's do something with the world we've been given"   -Rabbi Michael Melchior

·    It's not what Judaism is about, but what we do with it!

            However, the second panel I went to, in the exact same room, was on Israeli art and the potential it has for connection yesterday to tomorrow. The difference between the two panels could not have been larger! Where the first was boring and dry, this one captured my attention and made me thing, as opposed to just trying to write things down. The first panel was difficult enough to follow that in my trying to write down points, I feel I sufficiently MISSED the actual points each speaker was trying to make. In the art panel, I was writing because I was intrigued, moved by what I was hearing, and that sparked internal dialogue. That writing is below, as I might as well keep my musings somewhere. Although somewhat scattered and not the most sensical, these are the ideas that most captured my attention and held my interest! (The panel was Joseph Ceder, film maker; Edgar Keret, short story writer; Sigalit Landau, artist, landscape installation; Achinoam ‘Noa’ Nini; and art appreciator Rivka Saker. The moderator was even incredible. James Snyder has been in Israel since 1997, knows no Hebrew, and runs the Israel museum!).

Are individual differences what make artists so powerful? We all come from very different places, and end up with varying degrees of connection to the places we live. Also our place of residence is NOT always the place we most identify with. Instead, we often feel a pull or a draw to a place that speaks to us inside, in our heart, in our soul. So many artistic personalities feel that desire to be in Israel, either due to their past, a love, or just a profound need. Israel is a place where Judaism is just part of life, where biblical Hebrew has become the norm in the form of the modern Hebrew language. No matter the reason, people end up back here (in Israel), scattered throughout the country. In addition, the diversity of background from which most Israeli artists, specifically these ones, come from, lend themselves to further motivate and underlie the work.

Also of importance is the ability to create an absolutely unique scenario that draws in the audience. How far are we – as artists, as people, even as Jews – willing to escape from our own small world and experience the beauty that abounds beyond (even more important, how can one capture that and make it globally accessible)? Art needs to have a connection to the community and the people it is directed at. Artists are not homogenous, they come from all different backgrounds, which serve to expound upon and make the art scene flourish more.

            Every artists, somewhere, begins with a need to fit in and be a part of their community, to feel like they have a place, to be fulfilled with שלימות (wholeness).  It is all about making a difference in the world and understanding that you as an artist on the world stage represent the people you come from and will always be thought of as an ambassador of sorts for that community.

Artists, through their art, convey meaning. Those who come to see art often have no idea what the words of a song mean or what particular life experience a cinematographer got his idea from, but the artist needs to find some way to connect to his or her audience. People engage in the tone and the emotions; that is how they connect! They don’t need to know every single word, as the big picture can oftentimes be just as powerful, if not more so. Audiences all over the world engage with Achinoam Nini and love her music, while most of them have no idea what they are singing. That is the power of art; to capture heads and hearts and bring them in, connecting people to each other and to the world around them. Indeed, this is how art can be so locally connected, rooted in a specific spot but also incredibly powerful on a global, more universal scale.

Another question about art has to do with the religiosity of it. Jews have always been in the visual arts, but should they add religious aspects to the conversation? When artists take their background and feel more connection to the world, rather than material necessities, that is when the true beauty is manifested.

Translating colloquial Hebrew into other languages is so frustrating but also iconoclastic as words are invented and changed! People change between languages, from biblical language to a rap song to Yiddish. Not even that, but someone will make biblical references and almost EVERYONE understands them, which is fascinating and beautiful!

An artist is like a bird. If you tie her wings and her beak, she will die. She cannot continue.  -Achinoam Nini

The full circle of life

Waking this morning, I ventured into Facebook to check in with the world. I saw that someone had posted a video of kittens, a very adorable piece of infancy and new birth at its finest.

However, during my walk to school, I saw a cat lying dead on the sidewalk. The sad fact is, I have no idea how common an occurance this is. To die, to leave this adventure, is one of the scariest things for a human being to encounter face on.

However, what about animals? Are they faced with that same sense of the fleeting nature of life and existence? Do they even have the brain power to consider such an ephemeral existence?

Regardless, I do know that I am not indefinitely for this world. Seeing the youth and then death reminded me of such a truth. It reminded me that I need to truly experience and live my life, not simply allow it to pass me by without attention. Awareness of my fallibility also came about, as I recognized my full potential to both take for granted or fully grasp and immerse myself in life!

16:55

I was walking from Rachel's apartment, all the way to Emek R'fai'im to meet a friend, and took a pit stop at a bakery. Jeff had shown it to me previously, and I was excited to try something from this incredible place. However, when I walked in, there was no one there. So I looked around for a little while and another woman came in. She also was looking to buy something (it took me a minute to figure out she wasn't the shopkeeper), but we couldn't see anyone. The strangest thing is that all of the sweets were just out in the shop, easily accessible. I was shocked-an Israeli trusted people to just leave his or her shop unattended?

Learning, Lounging and Living

I’ve slept at Jeff, Nicole, and Ted’s apartment more times than I’ve spent in my own bed. This has nothing to do with not liking Mariel, or disliking my bed (okay, it has a little to do with that), but more to do with these three individuals. All three are incredibly caring, warm people. They have a sharp wit, full of sarcastic remarks but also profound thoughts. The late night conversations the three of them engage in deeply resonate with me, pushing my thoughts to higher and better things. I feel elevated around them, as though I am capable of more things. Every conversation they have, whether I am participant or observer, I come away with a different view on life, or at least a new perspective on a traditional topic. No matter the hour, they are willing to begin a verbal spar, because most likely the opinions are opposing, but the end result is concurrance. That atmosphere is a hard one to cultivate and is definitely one I am drawn to. Most likely, I crave intellectual stimulation, and since I spent so much time searching for it instead of accepting those around me who would actively aid me in it, I need to re-learn how to spark it and therefore participate in it. These three individuals have helped me find a portal for introspection and ideology, self-respect, representation and conversational prowess that I both didn’t know I possessed and wasn’t sure I would ever find.

Everything's a Little Bit Broken in Israel...

Everything in this country is fascinating. Whether it's the people, the cobble stoned streets, the stores, or even the parks, the entire country has a slightly different way of viewing the world and being viewed by others.

            Wandering the streets of Jerusalem with some of my new friends (Jeff and I have taken to going to the shuk often and then meandering before or after we get there to learn more about the city), I see these rather assertive Israelis waiting calmly for a light to change, signaling for them to cross the street and am shocked. Instead of acting like New Yorkers who cross the street no matter what is going on in the street, as long as a taxi or bus was not shooting through the crosswalk. Even stranger is that these Israelis will cross the street at crosswalks without the little man telling them what to do, but do so by just walking into the street and waiting for cars to stop, which they do, and then the individual crosses the street and goes on with their day. Such a discrepancy!

            Israelis have personalities much like Czech people, at least as I’ve seen. But first, by virtue of the fact that I am a girl, I get paid attention by a veritable plethora of individuals here. The men stare as I cross the street, and then women are rather friendly in passing. The only people who do not bestow kindness upon me are the Orthodox men, who view me as impure and not someone worthy of prayer/equal in prayer. Walking in the shuk, Jeff is often asked by Orthodox men to lay t’fillin. He abstains every time, knowing how much it upsets me that I am not considered worthy of doing so or even someone who could lay. Yesterday, as we were shopping for Shabbat, I commented on my anger at being dismissed and that I wanted to lay t’fillin, so Jeff said he’s buy me some. That pissed me off even more, because I can’t even BUY them, because women wouldn’t have any need for them, would they?

            However, Israelis are for the most part nothing like these people who refuse to acknowledge me now, and will definitely not acknowledge me in five years, once I am ordained. They are wonderful, effusive people who choose to speak Hebrew with me when I request it and try to rip me off in the shuk (part of that is that I don’t speak perfect Hebrew so it feels as if I am almost asking to be ripped off. Soon I’ll know enough to have a legitimate conversation and therefore be able to haggle and ACTUALLY understand when someone isn’t giving me a fair deal (or when I am not giving someone a fair deal)). Honestly, although I am not being given the benefit of the doubt and therefore being subjected to traditional American standards (that I am a dumb American and easy to rip off), I still love the shuk. The prices are cheaper then any supermarket, and the atmosphere there is so ebullient. Going up to a shop, finding the vegetables or fruits that I want and then having to wait because the shopkeeper is too immersed in conversation with his neighbor is one of the loveliest experiences. Not because I am being kept waiting, but because I am seeing real Israelis in action, the people who cannot be bothered by their livelihood to stop discourse with a friend. That is one of the meanings of peoplehood and culture of Israel. Plus, people are rushing around, trying to find what they want, pushing through the throng with a bubbe cart or elbow, only aware of their mental list and then getting home in time to cook dinner.

            Car drivers are a completely different story. They drive like maniacs, only to stop for people in the light-less crosswalks. They find the smallest space they can possibly fit into, in order to get where they are going the fastest. Horns honk at all hours of the night, resounding in my apartment and furthering congestion, rather then alleviating it.

            Of course, not all aspects of the city are endearing. The streets often smell of urine and poop litters the sidewalks (as well as actual litter). People do yell and are often unwilling to communicate with me as a foreigner. I am treated as dumb, rather than just someone who knows the language. And I always get looks for speaking English too loudly.

            However, this city has very quickly become a place that I consider home. I feel comfortable here. The atmosphere is one that cultivates Judaism, although not necessarily religiously. No matter someone’s religious upbringing, he or she speaks Hebrew and can easily access Talmud or Mishna without a second thought (besides the actual thought of understanding and digesting such an ancient manuscript). The people are in general a wonderful people and the tradition that has been cultivated for years captures me and connects me to both my past and my future, leading me into a further sense of the world/my world.

            I love this country. Living here might be a stretch and my Hebrew is definitely not up to par as of current, but I love being here. The language is beautiful and I am learning more each day. Becoming a Rabbi seems to be the right choice. At least I eat up the learning and language. The other, more introspective stuff will come hereafter, no?

“La’asok B’diveri Torah; To immerse oneself in the words of Torah”

We were getting our school books about a week ago and walking back, spotted an art fair. Stopping by, I quickly saw that this was not the kind of work that tickled my fancy. However, I noticed a used book store and decided to stop in (I’ve read so many books about people collecting used books, as well as the allure of them that I needed to check out the claim myself. Walking in, I was assaulted by the wonderful scent of books. Books carry a certain smell that just gets into your senses and truly fills you up, making me feel full and happy. Heading downstairs, I plopped down on the floor in front of a huge bucket of Machzorim (I was looking for children’s books). Rifling through them, I found ones of all different shapes and sizes, from all different years. Right above, I found used Talmud sets, with only one of many books present. I wanted to buy one, because of the power I felt from them, but was reassured that I would have a much better opportunity to attain my own set soon enough.

            However, the power in the history of my people, set among used fiction, biographies, children’s books and more, was captivating. I felt at home in my body, in this small bookstore off of King George Street. I could have stayed there for a long time, wandering aimlessly through the shelves and exploring what was at my fingertips. How incredible that such a small, literal hole in the wall could be a haven for someone like me, truly invoking my attention and propelling my interest (in a similar way that finding a connection between Hebrew verbs does).

* * *

            So Hebrew verbs. I’m writing this blog and get to a word, to notice. Every other word in the sentence was one I knew in Heberw, except the verb, to notice. Of course, because I am in Israel and actively engaged in attempting to learn Hebrew, I needed to look up the word and figure out what it was. As Hebrew is a language of connection and continuity (for the most part), I then found that the word for to notice (l’havchein) was from the same shoresh, or root, as the verb to examine, or to test (leav-hon) and related to the words for quiz (bo-han) and test (miv-han). The connections, kesherim, are abounding and therefore excite me so much that I can find those connections and then use them to learn about other similar words and increase my vocabulary.